November 13th, 2013
That’s not an unusual statement to hear these days. Whether it’s a celebrity discussing his porn addiction, or a partner of someone identifying as a sex addict – you have probably heard about this “epidemic.”
I, myself, am a little more suspect of the ability to be addicted to porn. Addictions are
physical and psychological processes that include a variety of indicators, including withdrawal symptoms. I’ve yet to hear of a person who experiences the DT’s after stopping his viewing of pornography on –line.
That’s not to say that people don’t experience problems with their time spent looking at porn. We hear about that as well. However, poor decision making or compulsive, unaware behaviors don’t equal addiction.
Why is this important? I think telling someone they have an addiction – especially when it’s debatable if it’s scientifically possible to have such an addiction – is stigmatizing. More importantly, further stigmatizing someone’s sexuality – a sexuality that is most likely coupled with shame – is particularly harmful.
In my experience, people surreptitiously view a lot of porn for a variety of reasons – none of which are due to an addiction. Unresolved sexual desires, an unfulfilling sexual life, unacknowledged sexual desire, and shame about one’s sexuality are some of them. Others spend too much time watching porn because they are anxious, depressed, or lonely. Porn and the feelings that come while watching it can alleviate those uncomfortable feelings.
If you think you have a porn addiction, you might want to explore these areas of your life – with a non-judgmental therapist. Porn can be – and is – fun for a lot of people. It doesn’t have to be a problem…and if it is, there are ways to explore your desires, your feelings, and your relationships in a way that can make you feel more comfortable with who you are.
If you’re looking for a therapist or counselor in Dupont Circle, Washington, DC, feel free to contact Mike Giordano at Mike.Giordano.MSW@gmail.com or 202-460-6384.