Accepting Difficult Emotions
November 30th, 2012
Archive for the ‘Therapy & Counseling’ Category
Morally Straight?
September 18th, 2012
I recently read an article about the Boy Scouts of America’s continued determination to keep gay men and adolescents from participating in the organization. The leadership uses the argument that being gay is not “morally straight.” The concept of morality and sexual orientation is an interesting one. And in my work as a therapist, I’ve learned that morality is certainly subjective.
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Riding the Wave
July 11th, 2012
Have you been surfing lately? Summer’s here and the beach isn’t too far away. I’ve never surfed in the ocean myself…but there is another kind of surfing that I practice. There’s another wave to ride…and it wont get you wet. I’m talking about the wave of emotion.
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The Therapist/Client Relationship
January 1st, 2012
Clients seem surprised when I ask them questions like “Are you mad at me?” or “Have I offended you?”. They often feel uncomfortable answering directly – which I completely understand. However, I do this for a reason. In fact, I do it for several reasons, which I will further explain.
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The Movie “Like Crazy” – A lesson in tolerating your emotions
November 30th, 2011
Have you seen the movie “Like Crazy” – a film about two young lovers who keep attempting to have a relationship with each other, even when it seems in vain? It’s not an unusual story. In fact, the couple’s experience is very human. As a therapist, I found some very useful lessons in it. But first: Spoiler alter! Don’t read on if you don’t want to know the storyline…
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Questions and Compassion
September 26th, 2011
Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves.
–Rainer Maria Rilke
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Hanging On
June 12th, 2011
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. Have you heard this saying before? I’ve seen it credited to Franklin Delano Roosevelt. And I’ve been thinking about what it means to feel like you’re at the end of your rope, when you believe that you can’t take any more. When you feel like you just can’t go on.
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“When will I feel better?”
March 4th, 2011
People often come to therapists to feel better. They are tired, depressed, anxious, worried, down…you name it, as you’ve probably been there yourself. Folks will often see therapists with the hope that these feelings will go away…quickly. In fact, sometimes in the first session, clients ask me directly, “When will I feel better?”
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Rigorous Honesty
December 1st, 2010
Therapy and counseling can be difficult. You make the appointment and show up with the best of intentions. There are some things you need to work on – to talk out. You then find yourself face-to-face with the therapist and you just can’t bring yourself to speak your truth. You feel self-conscious, conspicuous, embarrassed or perhaps vulnerable. You know that being honest with yourself will help, but it’s difficult. Sometimes it takes courage to be honest.
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Poly-Friendly Therapy
August 30th, 2010
Judgement. I know you’ve felt it from people, maybe even from a therapist. Judgement that your “lifestyle” isn’t healthy. That there’s something wrong with your open relationship. Maybe you’ve even been told that your intimate relationships are a sign that you can’t commit, you’re immature, or some other nonsense.
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